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Ironically perhaps, my fiance only being a couple of hours from joining me here, I’m still as impatiently waiting as I have been for the many months this process has taken. I think we’re both in for a big shock at how to feel once the waiting disappears. It’s became such a large and central part of both of our lives that we’re going to have to work lots of things out all over again.
But I wouldn’t change it for anything. Time to stop waiting and start being.
You often hear complaints of wives to be having uninterested and unhelpful future husbands when it comes to organising a wedding. This may well be true, however it seems that should these men take an interest, perhaps try and organise a few parts of the wedding or in fact do pretty much anything with the word wedding attached will hit one common major pitfall.
So what is it? It’s fairly simple, they don’t really want to talk to you. Who doesn’t want to talk to you? Pretty much anyone, the venue, the registrar, the cake decorator, they’re all interested in talking to one person and that person really isn’t you. As an example, we’ve chosen a beautiful venue which I checked out many months ago, I organised the place, signed for it, paid for it, gave them my contact details. But who do the correspondence letters always come addressed to? My fiancee of course, because clearly having been completely in control of the situation I am now redundant because there’s a woman they can contact.
This behaviour is very common in the wedding industry and something I’m starting to tire of, why make extra obstacles for the rare man who actually wants to help with his own wedding? You never know, he might actually be competent at it.
Shhhhhhh! No I’m kidding, I’m not foolish enough to write on our shared blog about something the girl shouldn’t know.
Instead I’m writing about something that caught my attention recently and quite frankly, has bugged me ever since. For those that don’t know, in the UK there’s a television channel called BBC Three. Nothing wrong with that, I like the BBC and quite a few shows that are on that specific channel, but what I can’t stand is a show based on the assumption that men (or women) are useless.
The show called “Don’t Tell the Bride” is based on the principle that men sit back and do nothing whilst women plan every last detail of the wedding. The BBC offers to pay for their wedding (up to a limit of course) but with just one rule, the man has to plan the entire wedding, because of course, he must be useless at such a thing and therefore the whole thing will be a train wreck! Brilliant TV carnage must surely ensue!
Now I understand that men traditionally are less involved in weddings than women, but thats often because we aren’t exactly encouraged to participate. “It’s all about her!” is often quoted at me by men and women alike to which thankfully, the girl and I laugh and tell them it’s not so. Men are perfectly capable of planning a great wedding, as the show eventually goes on to usually prove, however the constant jabs at the husband to be’s ability to organise such an event make this program about as progressive as raising your daughter to believe her only choice is to be a stay at home mom.
I think the BBC execs might, in future, want to produce shows that have a little decorum and leave the trash TV to itv, because they seem so very good at it.
A relationship and of course a marriage takes two people (well unless you have some very liberal ideals) to work. So we’ve decided to split the content of this blog in two as well. I’ll be offering my perspective from the UK and male perspective whilst the girl does the American and female stuff. Hopefully this unusual approach to writing a blog will help those in a similar and stressful situation see how to handle the it and most of all, not feel alone in the process as we did.
the girl
the boy
